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A new team. And I’m not on it.

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So we’ve been fostering for over a year and a half. When we began, we told cps that we weren’t really interested in adoption.

We are now in the process of adopting our second placement. Who arrived about a month after our first.

From day one I’ve had a great relationship with cps. Even if I haven’t loved every person we’ve worked with, our experience overall has been positive. I’ve felt like I was part of a team. And while there were certainly measures in place to make sure we weren’t crazy, everyone treated us as though we were with them. The parents are the one who need to be micro managed and examined. We’re known. We’re team players. We’re a good home.

So, I was completely taken aback when we met our adoption worker and suddenly felt as though I was being inspected, watched and measured. I understand why, but I’ve been at this, and with this child long enough that I assumed I had proved myself.

Apparently not.

Throughout our meeting I felt as though I were fumbling and bumbling and saying all the wrong things. Probably not, but still. She didn’t put my mind at ease.

We’re looking at a process that will take about 6 months? Maybe more. And this woman needs to give her OK. And she’d our only contact. And I’m praying that we are able to connect, because I know this sounds crazy, but I miss the old team already.


About Monica

Christ following, husband loving, children hugging foster and adoptive mama.

3 responses »

  1. Damn. That sucks you’re not being supported like before; here’s hoping it’s just temporary.
    Going through the same things as you in a way, although we’re behind you – only just starting the adoption process (it’s not for sure the child will even be ‘able’ to adopt). Sending you lots of foster-y support,

  2. Yeah, that’s a hard road. God and you and your family will make it through it, I have no doubt. But uncertainty is never any fun. Much love to you.

  3. Exciting you are adopting…it will get easier…Better join the gym and start working out – as adoption involves a whole bunch of hoop jumping. Can your old worker smooth the way? Does your foster support group have other families who may know of this worker’s strengths/hot buttons?? Wishing you a smooth journey…


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