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7:15 in the am.

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That’s when the day started for Simeon. That’s about the time he decided to run the day. He disobeyed the first, simple instruction. One that he actually loves to do and often does on his own.

Then he sat in the corner and pouted for an hour. Occasionally he’d scream. Or yell at me to shut up. Even when I wasn’t talking.

Then he took all of his dirty clothes and dumped them in the hallway.

Then he piled up all of his clean underwear and pajamas and mixed them in the dirty clothes.

He hummed a merry tune. Seriously.

An hour and a half later, he’s done. Just done. Happy and ready to take on the day as though the past hour and a half did not exist for him.

And other than cleaning his room, which he will happily do, he receives no consequence for disrespect, for making a mess, for spending the morning screaming and angry.

Because I can’t spank him. Not that I would. I don’t think he would care. I can’t take things away. He doesn’t have much and a toy or privilege lost quickly becomes of no value to him. I can’t isolate him any more. He just spent the past hour and a half alone by choice. So… what do I do? Tell me oh wise and savvy moms, what do I do??? Do I do anything??? Do I pretend it doesn’t matter??? Do I even acknowledge that he was hateful and disrespectful, when I suspect he knows? I suspect that was the whole point.

I suppose I accept him because he is who he is. And I love him. In spite of all the angry. And the dirty laundry. Kind of like how I’ve been loved. Consistently and graciously even when I don’t deserve it.

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About Monica

Christ following, husband loving, children hugging foster and adoptive mama.

5 responses »

  1. In a matter-of-fact way, I’d make him help fix the laundry issue.

    “Well, Simeon, it looks like you’ve got some laundry to do. We all work together in this house to get chores done and there is quite a chore here in the hallway. And since we don’t know what is clean and what is dirty now, we’re just going to wash it all.”

    Hum a merry tune while you’re putting the clothes in the washer with him.

    From there, if you’re me, bite a hole through your tongue. ‘Cause you want to yell at them and scream at them and make them see and fully understand how disrespectful they were. How wrong that was.

    But they won’t see it. And they certainly won’t care.

    So it really doesn’t matter.

    Oh crap – I hate that part!

    Then, go on to Christine’s website and read all her therapeutic parenting posts. Watch all of her videos again. And pray, pray, pray that you can let go and just move forward.

    Reply
  2. will you please post this Christine’s website? Thanks.

    Reply
  3. You can find Christine at http://www.welcometomybrain.net. You can also search her videos on YouTube – Christine Moers. My personal favorite is the video for “when your kids get stuck”. Every time you can “out crazy the crazy” it helps with overall sanity.

    Reply
  4. I need to look her up.

    Reply

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