Simeon was at visitation recently and someone noted how nice it must be for me to get a mandatory break every once in a while. Without thinking I blurted “it’s not nice! I like being with him.”
Then I realized how much I meant it. I don’t like it when he’s gone. Especially at a visitation.
We have court coming up very soon.
I know that everyone with a say will be suggesting Simeon stay with us.
Each day he’s in our care, I become more and more attached.
His mother is still doing ridiculous things. Her priorities are way off and that’s an understatement.
She brought a strange man to visitation. That she has only twice a month. For two hours.
*sigh* I don’t want to pray that this woman loses her child.
But I don’t want to lose him either.
I feel like a life with her is one without hope. I fear he will be doomed to following in her footsteps.
I didn’t sign up for this. For so much love. For so much bonding. For so many I love yous that may never get said. For this much hope. For this much dread.